I am a Survivor

New Creation in Christ Jesus Joined: 27 Sep 2006 Posts: 5

Tyra Banks show the other day...

Tyra's show the other day had Michaela from American Idol, Season 4. She was the distinct voice that reminded you a bit of Fran Drescher. She was in Vegas last month when she left a studio she was at and this man held her and a guy friend at gun point. She froze.... her body froze. She had never experienced trauma like this before. Her guy friend was able to lay her down on the ground as directed. He touched her... sexually assaulted her.

She gets "it"... she teared up at the thought of the alienation she feels from this. She pleaded with God in her head... "Please don't let this be the way I lose my virginity". Not to say that it is ok any other time... it was just the thought that came to her head. She spoke of the differences in her now... she is introverted, scared to be alone, doesn't want to talk on the phone with friends, she is till in shock and mourning. She talked of the silence in this world around it; what we all know all too well. She was brave for her young self. She was still frozen when the guy let them live and ran away... she could not move. She gets that it is random and not our fault and did her small part at being a model... a voice to the world.

There was this other woman in the audience that experienced SA as well. She is struggling too. A guy jumped into her car and held her at gun point I believe.... he got in the rivers seat. She quickly remembered as he was driving that she had a box cutter in the passenger side door. She used it and got away after he SA'd her.

Then a woman who is a safety expert spoke about how to try to stay safe. I have mixed feeling about those people. It really comes down to how they portray "preparation vs. assault". Meaning... if they come across like... if you just take these steps... it won't happen to you.... as if to give us blame... then I cannot stand them. If they just give mindful tips without implying anything to the world... then they are ok. People who have no idea what it is like... the reality of it... can clamp on to the idea of being smarter about safety... easier than they can about the randomness of it. It just depends on the person, but I find somewhat of a trend out there. The last thing I like to hear... when Ab*se and assault actually comes up, is two things.

#1. The news for example: ## yr old woman was raped today... the assailant behind bars tonight. Story at 11:00pm. This is so misleading... and is one of two triggers for me. As if they get time and go to jail at the snap of a finger. PLEASE! This is very misleading to people who are not educating on Ab*se/assault.

#2. I hate to hear more focus on safety... how to protect yourself from perps. PLEASE.... yes general common sense tips are great... but why not.... since you have the national airtime... focus on the real reality of it. Portray the correct message.... that it happens all the time.... ALL THE TME... and rapists look like your neighbor, like your best friend, like any old stranger, like your family, like your husband... WHY? because they are. Why not talk about how much we are silenced, how hard the judicial system is on us... and for years to come in our aftermath, about how strangers in an alley is the biggest load of crap when it comes to the majority. They could talk about what feeds R*pe prone societies or how it may be hard for some that are raped by acquaintances.... but just think about how much harder it is for people who are raped by their partners... and finally.... how about CSA done by mothers and fathers or incest by siblings... How easily is that reality accepted in this world... and unfortunately... it is all too real! Safety this @&**@@!@#!!!!!!!

Anyways... it is just nice seeing someone else have a forum for me to watch... until I can be up there too.

Thanks guys... I guess I am just a little serious tonight and needed to talk.
Soul, Strength & Solitude